Are you looking to get the best spousal support deal? Besides hiring the best spousal support lawyers to represent you, there are plenty of other things you should do. Which are these other things? Here they are:
Give each other time
If you have started talking about the spousal support amount, but the negotiations aren’t going anywhere, don’t force it—take some time off and come back to the table once the tempers have cooled.
Focus on resolving issues. Don’t create them.
Once you have decided to end your marriage, there is nothing else you can do. Some people make the mistake of starting to blame each other for the ultimate death of the union, but you shouldn’t do this as it often creates more problems than were originally there.
One of the principal laws of collaborative law is to try to find a solution. Not to create a new one.
When negotiating spousal support, stick to what you are trying to achieve—don’t bring sideshows.
Be an active listener.
When you are caught up in emotions, it’s easy to want to talk to no end. Unfortunately, this won’t solve anything.
Be an active listener for your spouse and their lawyer to hear you out. You must be wondering how being an active listener will make your spouse hear you out, right?
Since both of you want to be heard, no one wants to listen, so you should be the bigger person and take your time to listen to your spouse’s ideas and concerns. Once they have talked their heart out, empathize with them, then ask them to let you pour your heart out too.
Be reasonable in your request.
As much as you want to maintain your lifestyle when you were married, it doesn’t mean you should strain your spouse. Remember that your ex has a life after you are gone, so you should be reasonable when making your request.
For example, if your spouse makes $5000 a month, don’t expect them to pay you $4000.
If you aren’t sure about the right amount to ask, consult your attorney.
Be ready to compromise.
When negotiating, be ready to compromise. Some people get into negotiations with a mentality that they won’t budge from their position, but this won’t be of much help. For you to get a great alimony deal, you need to be collaborative.
As you are negotiating, don’t state the amount you want, then say that you aren’t budging. When your spouse and their team make a counter offer, say that you understand where they are coming from, then give your reasons why you think moving in that direction is the wrong thing.
Great phrases to use include, “I understand how you feel, but hear me out…” and “I hear you, but…” this shows that you are interested in what they are saying, but you have your reasons their side won’t work.
Don’t ambush your spouse.
When negotiating the spousal support payments, most people ambush their spouses with the amount they want to be paid. This isn’t right. The right strategy is to converse with your spouse about spousal support.
Explain to them how much money you will need, then start your negotiations from there.
During the negotiations, try as much as possible to maintain calm. This calls for you to avoid using harsh words or getting worked up, especially when you don’t get what you want.
It will even be better if you let your divorce lawyers Fairfax VA talk on your behalf if you feel you cannot maintain your calm.