It takes two to get married, but only one to file for divorce. If you have been having issues in your marriage, your spouse is probably contemplating divorce if you’re thinking about it but haven’t decided.

Before making a decision, you should refrain from acting in a way that would encourage you or your partner to file for divorce.

Instead of forcing a divorce through your actions, you should get a divorce because you have determined it is what you want. To help you out, here are a few things you shouldn’t do if you are thinking about divorce:

Don’t seek legal advice from friends and family

Each divorce is unique. Some people treat their friends or family members who have gone through a divorce as their divorce lawyers, but this is wrong. Every divorce has a unique set of facts.

As you know, laws are intricate. Divorce rules are subject to change and have done so in the past. If you feel that you need divorce advice, don’t get it from friends and family. Instead, you should speak with a divorce attorney.

The attorney will point out the issues you need to look at. The good thing is that they won’t speak to your spouse, which means that they won’t let the cat out about your planned divorce before the right time to do it.

The same way you should never get legal advice from your friends and family is the same way you should avoid discussing anything to do with your marriage or divorce with them. In short, you shouldn’t talk about any details about your strained marriage with them.

People’s attitudes towards you and your spouse may change if you disclose to them that you are considering a divorce. This implies that you should also refrain from talking about your marriage on social media.

Your relationships with your spouse may suffer if friends and relatives start pushing for your divorce. Even if you wish to stay married, a strained connection between your family and your spouse could lead to your partner filing for divorce.

Your friends and relatives may feel betrayed by you if you make up with your spouse.

So, if you are thinking about divorce, don’t discuss about it with anyone. Simply keep it to yourself, and if you really have to talk about it, talk about it only with your attorney.

Don’t hurt your spouse intentionally.

Don’t do anything to intentionally harm your spouse while you are making decisions about the future of your marriage. Taking revenge on your partner will only make you two more distant.

Such acts could be used against you in the divorce process should you decide to be divorced. A judge may make up for any financial losses your spouse suffered as a result of your acts. A judge may also take these deliberate harms into account in a custody dispute, depending on their nature.

To stay on the safe side and be a good person, you should treat your spouse as a decent human being. As a rule of thumb, treat them the way you would want them to treat you.

In fact, don’t treat them in a way that would make them question your love towards them.

Don’t threaten your spouse with divorce.

Seeking to change your partner is a natural reaction when there are issues in your marriage. While you might be feeling this way, you should note that you shouldn’t threaten your partner.

Divorce is closer when you make the threat. Sometimes, the other spouse just accepts the offer to get divorced after the threat is issued; in such cases, you separate and file for divorce.

Don’t spy on your spouse.

Refrain from attempting to ascertain your spouse’s online activities or driving whereabouts. This is because your relationship will suffer greatly, and all trust will be lost if your spouse finds out about the spying. You should know spying yields no positive results. Any knowledge you gain will probably result in more strain on your relationship and lead to your divorce.

There are no lessons that eavesdropping can teach you to strengthen your marriage. In addition, several forms of eavesdropping on your partner are illegal. It is unlawful to snoop on someone’s computer or phone or covertly record information.

This means that in the event you present the details you obtained during your spying, the court will dismiss them and even fine you for engaging in illegal activities.

Don’t hide your money.

Don’t move money to keep it a secret from your partner. You also should avoid carrying a large credit card debt. Regardless of what your spouse may have done, practice sound financial management.

A judge will always be made aware of improper financial activity. Your spouse will probably sue your relatives for “fraudulent transfers” if you give them funds to stay safe. The goal of a fraudulent transfer case is to get the transfer reversed.

It is preferable that you transfer such assets only after receiving approval from a judge or your spouse.

You should also consider giving up dangerous investments like penny stocks and cryptocurrency if you have made any of them. A judge will award your spouse half of the profits in the event of a divorce, but you will be responsible for all investment losses.

Don’t have a trial separation.

Divorce is virtually invariably the outcome of trial separations. One will require a separate place to live if they decide to move out of the marital residence.

Tenants are required to sign a one-year lease with landlords. This implies that since a contract requiring rent payments for a full year has been signed, you won’t be able to reconcile after a month. The majority of trial separations end up being one year long, which often hurts your marriage.

This time frame is lengthy. Every couple wonders what the other is doing while the kids aren’t around at this time. Fears that the other spouse is having an affair arise from such thinking.

Worse still, some will genuinely have extramarital affairs. This is particularly true if the rental apartment is located in a sizable building with lots of single and divorced residents.

Family lawyers Fairfax VA recommend that you stay in the same house with your spouse. Even if you don’t feel like staying with them, do it, as it gives you time to think about your marriage and where it’s heading.